How do you explain it?

question mark on a sticky note against grained wood

I’m really bad at leaving jobs.

I mean really bad.

I feel like the worlds going to end, and I’m the worst person in the world.

Ridiculous, I know.

But a sea of anxiety stirs up inside me when I have to hand in my notice, and I feel like I’m going to be hated.

I lie awake going over what I’m going to say, thinking through every word. I even write out a speech in the ‘notes’ section of my phone sometimes.

Luckily for me, now I’m self-employed and work directly with families, so this rarely happens anymore.

But even telling my families I was pregnant was stressful!

I felt the need to apologise.

“I erm have something I need to tell you. I’m erm, sorry but I’m pregnant. Sorry.” I legitimately said this to one of the Mum’s I work with!

I laugh now at how ridiculous this is!

Especially as she immediately grinned, gave me a hug and congratulated me.

I just couldn’t think of what to say.

And big life events like this inevitably occur when you have children with autism too.

And you may also worry, stress out and wonder how to possibly explain something so big?

How do you explain to your child you’re moving house, their siblings moving out, they’re changing schools or someone’s passed away.

There’s no wrong or right answer to how you explain these events. And every autistic child is so different so ONE way won’t work for all children.

But noting down a few clear, well-explained sentences is a good start.

For example…

Moving house: “On Monday we are leaving this house and aren’t going to live here anymore. We will have a new house, and you will have a new bedroom.”

Sibling is moving out: “On Monday Alex is leaving to live in a different house on his own. He won’t live in our house anymore. He will come back to visit us.”

Using short, straight to the point phrases like this is a great way to help your autistic child understand big life-changing events.

Give them time to ask any questions and even prompt them…

“Would you like to ask me anything about what I just said?”

Let me know how you get on.


My new programme for parents and carers of children with autism is launching very soon!

It’s for any parents and carers who want my 1 on 1 support helping their child progress in all areas of their development…

And if you want to be one of the first to hear about it, click the link below and put yourself on the priority notification list.

Join the priority notification list here

Speak with you soon, until then

Live every moment, Love beyond words and make a difference today…

Emma Ottaway

The Ambitious Autism Ambassador

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